In the course of taking stock of my own mental health, over the past 72 hours, I was reminded of my attempt to start something called the Talossan Empathy Network. It would have been a space for vulnerable, challenging interpersonal discussions which I think could have been a tool for growth, connection and even transformation.

Here was the announcement from quite a while ago:

Quote from: Breneir Tzaracomprada on August 25, 2022, 07:10:20 PMThe past six months have seen a remarkable number of instances where citizens reference struggles with their mental health. Obviously COVID and economic difficulties are implicated somewhat. And I aware that none of us, insofar as I am aware, is a mental health professional but that does not mean we are unable to be sources of empathy and compassion for one another. The education of our personal experiences, while not qualifying us to be truly effective clinical providers, does allow us to provide the ear and eyes of someone who knows the path the other speaks of.

There will be inevitable, necessary considerations on privacy concerns which may vary by person. But in this thread and maybe a freestanding group in the future I would like to guage public interest in convening a mental health support group. If it is warranted and advisable, then what are concerns that need to be addressed before launch?

I am certainly not the best person to sponsor and spearhead it now. But I do think some kind of dedicated effort to nurture these kinds of discussions could make Talossa a place of belonging and comfort. Should someone take the baton I believe that there was a suggestion that the discussions be guided by the rules of Nonviolent Communication.

PER.

I'm willing to admit that Breneir has done a thing to atone that required some modicum of effort and sacrifice. He may even have learned something from it.

Unfortunately, his chosen course of conduct in the 18 months preceding must weigh into the judgements we make of his character, and, as such, what I would further suggest as a much more comprehensive gesture of his wish to change for the better is for him to see a (secular!) mental health professional specializing in personality disorders.

Of course, it would be a violation of his privacy if he were to be compelled to inform anyone of a hypothetical diagnosis, but if he were diagnosed, and if he received a list of next steps the following of which led to an apparent change in his conduct and approach to others, that to me would clear him of all my misgivings about his character going forward.

Apologies for necroposting.
My delegation to Al-Khalil/Hebron has been delayed to mid-2027 but I am still planning to create an FT special from my time there.

Alright, now to Talaviac'hi food. The first cultural food item, as approved, by the only other Talaviac'hi on Earth is something that is a fusion of Japanese and Hawaiian tastes.

It's musubi.


Consulting the wiki oracle for additional information:

QuoteSpam musubi is a form of musubi that originally came from Hawaii, a popular item in the lunchboxes of Hawaiian plantation workers. The origin of Spam musubi is disputed. Survivors of the Japanese American internment camps on the mainland of the United States claim to have invented the precursor to Spam musubi, when they placed seasoned slices of Spam on white rice in a baking pan. However, most origin stories focus on Spam's ubiquity in Hawaii during and in the aftermath of World War II. With few other options, the canned meat was incorporated into local cuisines wherever American troops were stationed. For example, South Korea's budae-jjigae, a stew of surplus U.S. military foods, included Spam. In the United Kingdom, where Spam was ubiquitous during the hardship of the postwar years, Spam acquired a stigma exemplified by the 1970 Monty Python sketch. Spam may not have been abandoned in the Pacific like it was in the UK simply because of the comparative economic deprivation experienced in the Pacific region.

The Honolulu Star-Bulletin said of Spam musubi in 2002, "There is no definitive history for this aberration." Still, the newspaper relayed that a 2001 cookbook stated that the potential creator is Mitsuko Kaneshiro, who began selling them out of City Pharmacy on Pensacola Street in Honolulu and by the early 1980s was selling 500 handmade Spam musubi servings a day out of her own shop, Michan's Musubi. The other person said to be the creator of Spam musubi is Barbara Funamura of Kauai, who sold it out of the Joni-Hana Restaurant in the Kukui Grove Center. The Garden Island in 1983 described it as, "Spam and rice, two local favorites, are combined in an enormous musubi (rice ball) wrapped in nori (sheets of dried seaweed)."

The fact that it is cheap, easy to prepare, and delicious combines three important aspects of Talaviac'hi cuisine. That it can be found in gas stations is also a notable aspect of the foodstuff. Any Talaviac'hi worth their salt knows that gas stations are havens of delicious gastrointestinal destruction. But do check the prepared date just to be safe.

An easy spam musubi recipe will be included in the next edition of the Talossan Book of Cuisine.

First, I wanted to ask @Barclamïu da Miéletz @owenedwards @Carlüs Éovart Vilaçafat and @Antaglha Xhenerös Somelieir

Barclamiu, I was genuinely hurt and confused when you requested to have your videos taken down from Fora Talossa. Ever since there seems to be hostility. I recall a conversation about furries in an immigration thread. At the time, as a member of a university Queer Collective group I had met my first furry so it was an honest curiosity to me. You later made fun of my appearance which was again quite hurtful. I continue to be confused as to what I did to you to deserve this. Was it a consequence of what I said to Luc or the heat of politics? I'd like to better understand because I do not want to be a source or a recipient of harmful words. Please feel free to talk privately if you wish or not to respond at all I will try to understand either way.

Owen, I assume it is due to the what I said to Luc as it is around that time that communication declined. I recall you were to be a judge for the, I think, 4th round of the El Pretz Poetry Prize, but communication stopped and I finished the proceedings. You've been wise counsel in the past so how might I prevent a reoccurence?

Carlus, I think it might be the same situation with you, or you are just taking a break from Talossa. If it is the latter then it would be great to reconnect. If it is the former I would welcome a chance to learn from your perspective.

Antaglha, I asked you in the first group because we both appear to have mental health challenges. From your perspective, and some of your comments, I know there was much of what I have said which caused you anger and outrage. The chance of a response might be low but I ask for your counsel nonetheless because I believe I could learn from it.

With thanks again to my husband @Crement Itravilatx and to a wise Talossan @Tric'hard Lenxheir for inspiring me to try and make amends for past wrongs and to endeavor to be better. I am thankful to Crement especially for helping me to understand why I was reacting automatically in self-defense to what I perceived as attacks and how it might be related to past bullying. He encouraged me to put the focus on understanding what was said was harmful and that there is a human being involved. A second apology, a course, and leaving the Ziu followed.

Regardless of what it is said now about me by people I do not trust the focus must be on learning to ensure that my words match my intent. And that they reflect the true nature of my character.

Over the next few weeks I will be asking people to help me understand. Feel free to respond here or to correspond privately or not at all. Of course it is a choice but I hope to have your help because I think the discussion's benefits go beyond me.

As far as I am concerned, the issue re: the sexual harassment of @Sir Lüc is now closed, in that Breneir has actually paid a penalty that means something. The "official boycott" has run its course and I will no longer oppose Breneir being considered for Government jobs.

On the other hand, if Breneir keeps saying things like this:

Quote from: Breneir Tzaracomprada on Yesterday at 09:49:44 AMI hope that others will consider that shame and name-calling can cause the person you are asking to reflect and change to become defensive especially if they have suffered bullying in the past. It was only with the help of my husband that I decided to move beyond self-defense and explanation even while the attacks continued to apologize a second time and agree to the additional requests that were made.

I know you think you've succeeded but this campaign caused mental harm to me that was not proportional to the offense and I believe that you enjoyed the pain you were inflicting. I have asked God for help with forgiving you.

it will show he hasn't learned anything on the broader question, meaning that he will not rebuild bridges among Talossans who aren't married to him.

Let's run through this bit by bit:

Quoteshame and name-calling can cause the person you are asking to reflect and change to become defensive especially if they have suffered bullying in the past

This is true. Other Talossans have suffered crippling bullying in our lives - even crippling homophobic bullying - and some of us may have coped for a long while by becoming self-righteous verpas unable to admit error, believing ourselves entitled to "dish out" what we received in our own lives. But we got better, or at least tried to.

Quotethis campaign caused mental harm to me that was not proportional to the offense

The initial offense could have been purged with a quick withdrawal/apology to Lüc. Refusing to acknowledge and repair the initial offense meant that others had the choice of (a) impunity; (b) escalation. The path of escalation imposed costs on everyone; yet, it was the correct choice.

Quoteand I believe that you enjoyed the pain you were inflicting.

Quite often, when we lack insight, we attribute our own motivations to others.

QuoteI have asked God for help with forgiving you.

As far as I understand it, haShem prefers we do our own dirty work.

I vote per

Quote from: Baron Alexandreu Davinescu on Yesterday at 02:38:26 PM

Quote from: Barclamïu da Miéletz on Yesterday at 02:11:52 AMWill we get dark mode?

This is a newer WikiMedia feature, and we'll work on making this possible throughout the wiki.  Once we update, we'll also need to update the CSS styling, but I have read that this is not too hard in the MediaWiki documentation and already have ideas about how to fix it.

Cool, I'll get to read the wiki at night (though I prefer dark mode in general but only on my laptop).