Being a jerk, minus a million points

[Antonio Montagnha, Ed. D.]

One of my academic areas of academic research is the philosophical, socially constructed foundations of ethics, and the practical application of such. Civility is a subbranch of ethics. Ethics simply don't exist without human construction or choice. This is not a bad thing, as it give us the power to decide what type of ethics will let us build the type of society that we want. We are not locked into the past or our biological drives. Unless we choose to be.

What should the standards of public, civil ethics (civility) be? That we must decide for ourselves through authentic and respectful dialogue, but what ever the decision I would suggest these principles have a place on that list:

Transparency in Decisions - Any process to do with the public good should be conducted in the full light of day and in public, unless national security (as opposed to personal or political party advantage) TEMPORARILY demands operational security.

Fairness and Justice - The opposite of war is not peace, but justice. Functionally this means that when making decisions, you should proceed as if you were assigned a random role in our society, post-decision. (see John Rawls "Veil of Ignorance" https://ethicsunwrapped.utexas.edu/glossary/veil-of-ignorance).

Mutual Respect - When making public comments about your fellow citizens, especially when you are angry or your ego is bruised, you must ask yourself how you would feel if similar comments were to be made about you or someone you loved.

Social as Opposed to Legal, Enforcement - While the extremes of ethics can have legal definitions, the main enforcers of civility are the individuals who make up the society in question. I am not talking of vigilantism, rather the firm but respectful calling out unacceptable behavior especially when it is being practiced by a friends or cultural or political ally. Often this is best done in private, though apologies for public comments lack weight if not done in public. Civility is not a zero sum game where you must protect your team at all cost. This even more necessary when you are an elected or appointed leader, and those you lead act in a way that violates a civil norm. For civility to truly take route it must become a defining and defended feature of our culture.

P.M. Forni was a professor at Johns Hopkins University where he founded the Civility Project. As part of his work he created a list of 25 rules for considerate conduct. I have found them very useful in my professional and personal life. https://realwellnessdoc.com/2018/03/14/choosing-civility/.

Finally, some less than ethical people choose to use the term "civility" for adherence to an arbitrary or exploitive order that advantages them or their "tribe" disproportionately. This explicitly rejects the definition of civility used herein and should not be confused.